Sorrow

 It's 11:05pm. I'm a little drunk, but at the same time I'm completely conscious. Tonight I greet you with immense sadness, a sadness that pulls at my heartstrings enough to elicit tears. Yet I do not weep. I do not have it in me to cry, to love, to enjoy. It is tonight of all nights that I have this sadness within my hollow body, one that will eventually fade. I do not whimper at it, in fact I embrace this sadness as whole fully as I possibly can, only because I know this will dissipate into ashy dust. Lately, nothing really hurts, nothing really makes me happy, nothing really does anything for me. I go to liquor to try and make me feel something other than this emptiness that vibrates throughout my entire body. I wish I was like others, at times. Oh how I wish I could be like them! Oh how they laugh and feel with such intensity! Oh how they love and hate with such passion! Toss me into the ocean with the corpses of the lost, for who will remember a nobody such as I? Such as one like me, who lives on the fringes of society like a parasite suckling the last drop of blood from an already decaying corpse. Who else but me, that has the gall to pretend to be something special. Feed me to the dogs.