Really, truly, everything

 It's currently 6:59pm. Ironically, I begin this post with a minute to spare, as time is forever moving forward. It's incredible how a single minute can be an eternity, or it can be less than a second. In one second, I could tell you a word that would encapsulate an emotion, such as anger, or love, sadness even. When we begin to deconstruct things, like an emotion in such a trivial conjunction of letters, it almost devalues the meaningful impact of the emotion itself. Much like our notions of morality in a world so uninterested in our very existence. Reality, I like to believe isn't as 'real' as we so proudly like to shout. How if the horrors of truth, were to be spoken to the average man, would make him blubber and crumble like the very feeble and weak pounds of flesh he represents. Oh they shout, how one without empathy should be shunned! Oh how they should be weary of these evil creatures! Every day, people are butchered, are torn, are violently molested. Humanity should not avert their eyes, at these heinous acts, but they should watch closely. Humanity should be held a mirror, in hopes they acknowledge it's abhorrent face. In many dreams, I wish that we would choose to realize the evil within, in hopes of changing ourselves to truly see what we are. On the other hand, should we see the evil, we may agree that it was, in fact who they were all along, and decide it's what humanity is, evil, monstrous, and forever a plague on the cosmos. It can be too much, too much sadness, too much apathy, too much to even try. I guess we'll see.

Forgetful

 It's currently 5:07am. Tonight or I should say, this morning I feel bored again. I have a boredom that precedes my future possibilities. It's strange to be here, once again. Once we have obtained our goals, where does one go? I keep pondering this, for if one finally achieves their greatest desire, then what more to life, can there be? What if, for one it is not to be a millionaire, or to find true love, or to be famous but what if it were to be able to wake up in the morning, and say "yes, I want to go to work". What drives people? The more I live, the less love I tend to feel, I'm protruding sensations of apathy in my everyday life, it surprises me that people around me do not see it flooding out of me. Oh how I see them with glimmers of hope in their eyes, how I envy that feeling. Who are we, but nobodies willing to pretend everyday like one has meaning. It never leaves, this feeling of seclusion, this feeling that I will never be completely human, it blinds me this shimmering loneliness, at times it feels unbearable. Unbearable that I could never truly connect, that I can never truly empathize, what is one life in a sea of souls, though? Reality is, one may never mean a damn thing, and THAT scares me.